Here at the Updoc Institute in bustling downtown Zonguldak, we are content to follow in the footsteps of one of our founders–who, so frequently asked “What is the higher, ultimate nature of reality, o you man of learning,” (although usually in fewer words)–and pursue our researches, with particular attention (no pun intended) to what results may emerge from the Large Hadron Collider in Switzerland, or wherever. In the meantime we spin some sides and look for charmed quarks and interesting segu├ęs.